If you guys wanted me to hate myself , you succeeded. Never wanted to disappear this much in my life. Never hated who i was this much. Never wanted to die , untill now.
I still check on you.
No matter what happened between us, or how long its been since we last talked, I still care, I wanna know you’re doing and feeling. I don’t stalk you but just enough to know you’re okay because you’re still that person I miss and the person who will always be in my heart.
even if you were a shitty friend or played me or threw me under the bus , i’ll still help you if needed
my current mentality is “im sad and i hate myself but i have to get good grades”
this just explained my entire life at this very moment








